Minute 61

 Minute 61 (by Leonie Horsch)

This is a story about closing chapters, about leaving a part of your life behind, about walking towards new beginnings.

For me, everything has to be perfect in the end. You could say I am desperate for happy ends. I hate watching movies where the world collides, or where two people who are meant to be together don’t end up together. If the end is not exactly a happy one, I just try to see the positive aspects. The end of my schooldays, a happy end! The end of a friendship, not exactly happy, but a lesson learned! The end of a year of embracing having no responsibilities yet, very happy end but very sad at the same time!

This again feels like something is ending. The end of a seminar, my final presentation, the end of my studies. A happy end! Am I scared of what’s to come? Not at all. I kind of have a plan, a schedule, and if that doesn’t work out I’ll figure it out along the way. There are people with backup plans and second back up plans. I actually never had one before, I never needed one.

Maybe that’s not completely true… sometimes I feel like I am living my backup plan. Becoming a teacher was always an option but never a priority. I know I am good at this, but what if another job could fulfill me even more? I always play on the safe side of life. I’ll be a teacher, that’s a pretty safe job.

Anyways, I sometimes get a strange feeling. That strange feeling when you know something is ending and you realise that you have just lived a whole part of your life without embracing every second of it. I sometimes catch myself looking for what’s to come instead of enjoying the here and now. The journey is the reward you say. My mum would agree.

She often says: ”you always have to keep something for next time“ as in don’t worry about seeing every sight when you’re traveling. She always encourages me to stay in the moment and enjoy the present. And if you want to relive that moment, you can simply come back.

And I believe her: you can always go back to certain parts of your life, at least for a little moment. You can always have your favourite meal from when you were eight years old, you can always listen to that one song that reminds you of traveling a whole continent with your best friend, you can always look at photos of a cherished memory. What I am trying to say is, life is not too short to stop and enjoy what you currently have, and not even too short to look back and remember when you wanted what you currently have.

Sometimes we don’t want something to end, because we’re scared? Because we do not want to begin new? We keep walking away from new opportunities, we choose the safer option. And I keep wondering „what’s next?“ with a feeling of curiosity and a feeling of restraint. I guess this is all part of the process.

Therefore, I will see this as just another ending in my life that will merge into a new beginning, knowing that I can always come back in a way. This is not a goodbye, this is a see you soon!

The end (at least for a little while)

Film minute 61 shows several scenes where people are leaving or walking away. This can symbolise, that the film is coming to an end. The development of the sound also seems to reach its climax and thereby creates a feeling of ending.

I connected this to my personal life by comparing it to my current state of finishing another chapter of my life. This text is my last presentation in my studies before I graduate. Moments like this bring happiness to me, they make me proud, but they can also bring doubt or raise questions. In my text, I present my thoughts on this aspect of ending in relation to my personal life.